Where are they now?

I posted an extract of this on the Adelaide Remember When FB page earlier today. Fifty years ago this month (April 1965) 92 teenage boys were presented the Queen’s Scout award by the then Governor Sir Edric Bastyan.  On April 3 (1965) the Queen’s Scout dinner was held at the Top of the Town Restaurant, in Cox Foys, Rundle Street, Adelaide. Back in the ’60s Adelaide did not have many restaurants, especially ones that could cater for a hundred or more guests.  Also the liquor licensing laws were significantly different to those of today (2015), and the legal drinking age was still 21 years of age – so that excluded a hotel venue. In fifty years my detailed memory of the evening has dimmed somewhat.  However, I recall being a little over-whelmed by the occasion – I was 17.  My father had driven me into the city as the event was seen as a significant ocassion by my family.  I caught the bus home afterwards.  The Chief Commissioner (for Scouts) was Henry Rymill, CBE. The 1965 Queen's Scout presentation dinner menu The program for the evening’s events included the Loyal Toast List to Her Majesty The Queen, and a toast to the 1965 Queen’s Scouts.  The response to the Queen’s Scouts Toast was given by Peter Balan, who has since become a successful academic at UniSA.  I remember the film called: ‘The Senior Way’ being screened, but I have no recollection of what it contained other than it showed many images of Scouts doing scouting ‘stuff’. The Queen’s Scout Award is an achievement from my teenage years of which I am still proud and pleased to to include in my resume.  However, what has happened to the other 90 eager young boys – the stories of their lives, their children and grand children?

Presentation of Queen's Scout Award to David Sweet, Government House, Adelaide by the then Governor, Sir Edric Bastyan. (April 1965)

Presentation of Queen’s Scout Award to David Sweet, Government House, Adelaide by the then Governor, Sir Edric Bastyan. (April 1965)

Howard Hamon is the brother-in-law of my mate’s sister (a small world) David Jansen and I went to Glen Osmond Primary School together, but I lost touch with him many years ago, David Rattray (if he is the same person) and I were at Unley High and a number of other names from the ‘Menu’ may have been police officers. Is your name or the name of someone you know on the back of the menu (above)?  Maybe through my blog and Adelaide Remember When. the question can be answered.?

I wish I had the photograph

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Just over 95 years ago [March 23, 1920] Kingsford-Smith, later to become Sir Charles Kingsford-Smith landed his Vickers Vimy (a World War 1 bomber bi-plane) at the culmination of the first plane flight from England to Australia at the Northfield aerodrome on the outskirts of Adelaide.  It is now an inner suburb.

As a young boy, during our car trips through this area, my father would often tell, and retell, the story of his moment of being part of this historic event. Now lost over time, there had been a photograph of my father as an eighteen-year old taken on that March day in 1920. P1000498  My father [eighteen at the time] had walked and hitched rides from his mother’s home at Parkside to watch the Vickers Vimy land at Northfield.

The press of the crowd, reported to be in the thousands, was too great for him to catch any more than a glimpse of the Australian heroes, but he was there.  He saw the plane and his stories made that historic moment mine as well.  Dad had a photograph of his moment, amongst the crowd, at the landing.

From the old photograph that was buried in the bottom drawer of the sideboard in our dining room at home, I can remember my father in his suit and tie, white shirt, and bowler hat, jauntily smiling at the camera. Why is this important to me, and today?

Wearing my father's 'restored'  bowler hat.

Wearing my father’s ‘restored’ bowler hat.

The old, black, bowler hat had been one of the heirlooms that somehow has been in my possession for thirty or more years.  Over time it had been severely damaged and I had often contemplated tossing it out.  However, I kept it.  Today I collected this special piece of history from ‘Adelaide Hatters’ in the Adelaide Arcade, where it had been beautifully restored.

I have my father’s bowler hat, but I wish I still had the photograph.

I’m struggling with nostalgia

Class Photo, Glen Osmond Primary School 1955

Class Photo, Glen Osmond Primary School 1955

Nostalgia is a word that is commonly used to describe those enjoyable moments in our respective pasts.  We may recall times of riding push-bikes or playing marbles in the gravel on the way home from school.  Or for the girls it may be those special dress-up events when they became little pink princesses, or created elaborate afternoon teas.  No I am not being politically incorrect or sexist, that is just the way we played as kids.

So why are Baby Boomers nostalgic for that past, the ‘other’, which is so different to the experiences of today?   Often the call is made: “It so nostalgic to remember those good old days“.

The defining and understanding of the term nostalgia has changed over more than two centuries of use. Its genesis comes from the Greek nostos, which means a return to your home and algia, meaning a hurtful or agonising ailment.  According to Davis (1979, p. 1), nostalgia was a medical condition described by Swiss physician Johannes Hofner, in the eighteen hundreds, as a disease showing signs of melancholy through to suicide.  It was caused by extended absences from a person’s home.

However, over prolonged time its medical determination transformed in to a popular understanding of nostalgia being a sentimental yearning for a past that is gone and cannot be relived.  Yet there is this desire by many to remember previous times with a degree of longing and angst of loss (Pickering & Keightley 2006, p. 920). Their discussion emphasises that this ache for nostalgia should not be censured, but embraced to show ‘how the past may actively engage with the present and future’ (2006, p. 920).  Nevertheless, a blanket acceptance of the comforting cocoon of nostalgia does not assume that this ‘past’ is analytically assessed (Hutcheon 1993, p. 245).

In recounting war-time activities with New Zealand soldiers, Hutching maintained that nostalgia is ‘about their activities as young men’ (2011, p. 237).  In a personal observation Australian sportsman, author and journalist Peter FitzSimons (2010, p. ix) views nostalgia as: “through my own experience and that of my family, the simplicity of a time long gone in Australia’s past” is realised.  It should not convey sadness or a sense of loss, but needs to offer the magic opportunity to recapture those former and glorious moments (Holak & Havlena 1998, p. 223).

Yet is unrealistic just to evoke, or call on the ‘good times’ and feelings of nostalgia.  We cannot bring bygone days to life, and as commented upon by Holak and Havlena (p. 222) this promotes the feeling of sadness and loss, because there is no return to the past.  The memory of the “good old days” sets up the conflicting emotions of desire and melancholy. A longing for the past is not necessarily about recalling essential details as it is claimed that “one can be nostalgic for something one never experienced” (Green-Lewis 2000, p. 66).

Nostalgia is a ‘coping mechanism’, helping to support our identity and provide an avenue for forgetting (Mannik 2011, p. 87).  It is in our individual memories however they are created, that we recall the myths, emotions, memories and richness of nostalgia.

This outlines why I am struggling with nostalgia.  I see it as encompassing both the good and the bad from my past, the happy and sad times and those exciting memories and times of embarrassment.

Still the question remains, what actually is nostalgia?  Above I recounted its medical basis and historically it has been described as a cerebral disease and a serious psychiatric condition (Routledge et al. 2011).  Marketers and advertisers have ‘tapped into’ this nostalgic concept more recently as it can shape consumer preferences (Holbrook 1993, p. 255; Holbrook & Schindler 1996, p. 36; Stern 1992).  Those interested in cultural studies and sociology consider that nostalgia is more than a return to our home; it is the desire to experience the past once again, or to languish in sentiment and the status quo? While the definitions vary somewhat the understanding is similar.  The perfection of the past or the future is seen against accepting and embracing the present (Wilson 1997, p. 132). Wilson (1997, p. 138) concludes with the observation that:

Perhaps the real secret pleasure of nostalgia is … experiencing the reality of change, the passage of time, and the existence of that great hinterland of ‘lost time’ that yet somehow is still within us.

She seems to be claiming that while we embrace change we yearn for the past, a paradoxical position. It is argued that nostalgia is searching in the past while concurrently it is a starting point as a guide into the future (Pickering & Keightley 2006, p. 921).   I prefer to see nostalgia in a similar manner to that of Routledge et al. and it is more than just a positive memory (2012, pp. 458-459):

It is the self-focused emotional process through which people recollect experiences that imbue their lives with meaning.

There are many facets from which to reflect upon nostalgia.

However, my emphasis and understanding is on the comfortable acceptance of it being memories, cloaked in a warm fondness that can be experienced now and conveyed into the future. To this point I again draw on Wilson and her acquiescence of the ambivalent nature of nostalgia and it embracing both the past and the future (1997, p. 139).

So do you understand nostalgia?

PS.  Can you find me in the photograph above?  I’m in the back row, third from the left.

Good friends are forever

I have just experienced one of those joyous moments when a friendship is revitalised.

All too often I have sat on the sidelines and thought: “why hasn’t ‘so and so’ been in touch?”   Maybe the better question to ask myself would have been: “why haven’t I contacted them?”  People drift apart for numerous reasons – lack of time, new partnerships formed, moving, changing jobs – but it is never because we have just forgotten.  Lazy or not getting around to it may be the reason, but not an excuse.

Singapore, Chinese Bonsai GardensAt our fingertips we have the technology to contact someone at any time, yet who are our friends?  How many people on FaceBook, Twitter or any other social media outlet are your true friends?  Social butterflies, professional contacts, friends of friends, or even worse, online game friends, but who, if any would hold your hand, hug you, buy you a coffee (or a single malt Scotch) and listen without judging?

Yesterday afternoon I took a punt and sent off a text message to a beautiful friend whom I had only one contact with in the past six years.  A few hours later I received a reply.  I was wrapped.  We then ‘chatted’ for well over an hour and caught up on some of our respective experiences during our ‘time apart’.   So much has happened.  Have we changed?  Of course we have, and that is also wonderful to discover.  Are we still friends?  Yes.  Better, stronger and closer than before I expect.

So whether it is your best friend forever from school – whom you haven’t spoken with in ten years – a former work colleague with whom you shared special times, someone from your football or netball team, even a cousin, aunt, uncle or neighbour, just make the effort.  I guarantee that you will feel excited, and they will have a special surprise in their day.  If you get dumped on, well maybe they weren’t your friend in the first place – but you have made the effort.

Life is too short to lose a friend.

Thanks my SLaSH.

Death can be a release

On Saturday October 4, 2014 my sister Judith died.  She was 79, but her life was lost five years ago with the onset of dementia.  Earlier this week, at her funeral, I had to give the hardest speech of my life, Judith’s eulogy.  I have added it to the stories in this Blog as part of our family’s oral history.  You may enjoy my memories of Judith.

Looking for Yip Yau

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Let’s see how good the internet actually is for research.

I’m trying to trace the life of Yip Yau, born in 1896, (locality unknown) died in central Australia (possible near Alice springs or further north) in July 1943 (aged 47 years).

I have a photograph of my father at his grave taken in the latter half of 1943. Yip Yau was of Chinese ancestory. The English writing on his grave stone says: “In memory of good friend, Yip Yau. died July (28th?) 1943, aged 47”.

Chinese grave near Alice Springs, taken c 1943. Standing is Sgt Harold Sweet, father of David Sweet

Chinese grave near Alice Springs, taken c 1943. Standing is Sgt Harold Sweet, father of David Sweet

The grave as you can see from the accompanying photograph is/was quite substantial indicating that either his family had the finances and/or that he was respected in the community.

Any glimmers of hope would be appreciated.